"What is it with us Europeans and our "walking," a driver in Dallas asks. There's Uber, after all. "That’s why we bombin‘ the whole world for oil," he laughs. True words, casually spoken.
Great Interest
He hates Messi because he's a Chelsea fan, he explains. But he doesn't want to elaborate. In fact, no one here can escape the World Cup; it's omnipresent.
Every clothing store has its own World Cup line – USA, Mexico, Canada, Argentina, Brazil, France, England. Billboards are full of advertisements for Soccer, no, Football. Almost everyone you speak to corrects themselves to Football. They've understood that this is apparently important to us Europeans.
He Hates Red Bull
And many, many more than expected are truly interested in it. As we sat in the stadium with the Dodgers the day after Austria's World Cup exit, the classic US family in the row behind us asked us where we were from.
And then the son says: "I hate Red Bull. You got this 50+1-Rule, i love it." Frozen in shock.
In California, populated by Latinos, you can't go three street corners without seeing a Mexico jersey.
And yet, the football experience here is completely different. All stadiums offer canned beer, and many have escalators. The latter is free, the former costs as much as a new kidney in other parts of the world.
Elevator Attendants and Crawling Microphone Holders
Speaking of costs. Because FIFA is, of course, the poorhouse among sports federations, plunging itself into economic crises by selling dirt-cheap tickets for the sake of the fans, and in any case making the world a huge amount better every day, it relies on unpaid volunteers for manpower. Probably so it doesn't have to award itself a Nobel Peace Prize every day.
In any case, the volunteer jobs vary in nature. The most tedious is certainly that of the elevator attendant. There you stand for about six hours in an elevator, pressing the buttons for the floors where the press and other volunteers need to go. In Dallas, at least there was a mini-television in the elevator to watch matches.
Press Box: Place of Horror
The most undignified volunteer job is the one where you hand the microphone to journalists asking questions in the mixed zone and at the press conference. To avoid disturbing any camera shots, you have to do this either kneeling, squatting, or crawling. Depending on what your cruciate ligaments can handle.
Meanwhile, Messrs. David Beckham, Zlatan Ibrahimovic, and Christian Pulisic have financially benefited – they've seemingly snapped up 47 endorsement deals each and can be seen in every TV commercial.
From a journalist's perspective, the biggest adjustment are the press boxes in the stadiums. You sit in an enclosed room behind a glass wall to watch the game. The atmosphere in the breathtaking arenas can only just be glimpsed.
The fact that we always approach the local press officers to rebook to one of the few outdoor press seats causes surprise at first, but no longer later. An indication that journalists from other countries also find this custom strange.
Give it a try
However, because it's important as a guest in a foreign country to get closer to the respective culture, various things are tried out.
Axe Throwing: If I throw an axe at you, you'll at most die from blunt force trauma.
Baseball: 40 mph is fine, at 60 mph you stand no chance, in MLB they pitch at 100 mph.
Watching Baseball: 24oz beer costs 18 dollars, 12oz beer costs 4.5 dollars. Don't ask.
Traffic: Works just as well with two lanes as with six lanes.
Chicken Wings: Each one the size of a fist. Ordered ten, received six, complained, then received an additional ten. Didn't eat anything for the next two days.
New Addition to the Disciplinary Committee
Now I have to catch my flight. Incidentally, there are nine boarding groups here to allow for smooth boarding. I was in Group 8 every time – regardless of whether I was in the middle or at the very back of the plane, whether it was a window, middle, or aisle seat.
You don't have to understand this country. But you do have to leave it again at some point. That's what the orange-skinned man says, who is now also on FIFA's Disciplinary Committee.
